for drummers only

Check Thor's Rules: Really. .  go back and click the link- its right there, behind you- Thor's Rules- see it?

And now, drum roll. . . . One of the greatest drum riders ever! From Iggy Pop drummer (GH?):

Please do not take the liberty of improvising or altering this list on our behalf

A SPARKLING DW DRUM KIT(not black please)

(If you can't get a DW, please tell me , and let me know what other kits are available. Just don't mention the "P" word)

consisting of the following drum sizes

1 x 24 inch BASS DRUM, or Kick Drum if you prefer to call it that. What's that in centimetres? 66, 69 possibly? If you have a girlfriend, now is the time to ask where you keep the tape measure. 

If you have a boyfriend, he's probably sitting on it. 

1 X 13 inch and 1 x 14 inch TOM-TOM, WITH MOUNTING. And if you can't bring the mounting to us, we'll have to send a bloke called Mohammed to the mounting. A stand mount would be fine, or a bass drum mount. Here endeth the sermon on the mount.

1 x 18 inch FLOOR TOM WITH LEGS. Not stand mounted. Can't stand stand mounted.

ALL OF THE ABOVE fitted with Remo Ambassador Clear heads, top and bottom Or muddled heads and a bottle of Alka Seltzer.

That's Ambassador Drumheads, NOT Emperor

1 X LUDWIG 6" X 14 inch METAL SNARE DRUM. preferably a Back Beauty (not the horse) but a brass or a Supraphonic will doComplete with newish ambassador heads, coated on the top, and unbent snares please. Call me old fashioned... 

r1 X DW 5000 BASS DRUM PEDAL. Double chain type. With a footplate. And a little blue plaque with "William Shakespeare slept here for six months* in 1586.shagging the arse off of Anne Hathaway."

(*Not the whole six months, obviously. I think they woke him at mealtimes.) 

1 X DW 6300 SNARE DRUM STAND, that goes up very high, and preferably with legs that can be flattened against the floor., for at least a count of three.

1 X HEAVY DUTY ROUND CLOTH SEATED DRUM THRONE. Because he's a king.

1 X HEAVY DUTY HI-HAT STAND. A two legger would be super. As long as it was designed to have only two.

2 X HEAVY DUTY BOOM STANDS. Just fill them with gunpowder, light a match, and they go BOOM!

2 X HEAVY DUYY STRAIGHT CYMBAL STANDS. But we are equal opportunity employers, so gay stands may apply also. (They won't get the fucking job, though...)

SABIAN OR ZILDJIAN CYMBALS, as follows

2 x15 inch HI-HAT ROCK CYMBALS that sound nice and are roughly the same size

2 x 18 inchCRASH CYMBALS

1 x 19 inch CRASH CYMBAL

1 X 20 inch CRASH CYMBAL

3 X HEAVY DUTY FLOOR MOUNTED FANS. I'm making a hovercraft in my spare time

All of the above drums on a 

 CARPETED 8ft x 8ft x 2ft DRUM RISER/PLATFORM.

That's a 3m x 2m x 0.75m DRUM RISER/PLATFORM for those of you who live in the metric zone

Note to our American brethren: A metre is about 3 feet 3 inches. 

And 'metre' is 'meter' spelt correctly...

Oi Oi, that's yer lot.

Thank you.